Bury the Malice Under a Bullet
by TPHPSW15
Summary: The worse case scenario to happen to Bucky and Steve after Winter Soldier, where Bucky has made no progress and everyone is desperate.


It had been two years.

After DC and the crash in the Potomac with the hellcarriers, a week later Bucky arrived to Steve's apartment. Excited to see his friend again he didn't notice he was brandishing a knife behind his back, and he attacked him with it. Steve called Sam after he had to knock Bucky out to stop him and he arrived with words of 'be careful' and 'gonna get yourself killed'. Bucky every waking moment was either standing still and rigid with the darkest glare or weaponizing the first thing he could find and putting it into taking Steve down.

He grabbed a lamp in the living room and ripped it out of the wall and smashed it over Steve's head or once he took the toaster and would've bashed his head in, if not for him moving at the last second.

Sam called Tony, with disagreement from Steve, and Bucky was put in the Hulk proof room. There were no windows, the door was metal and was voice activated by telling JARVIS to open or close it. The walls had slight padding and concrete behind that, then titanium, then more concrete. Tony wanted to add vibranium into the wall system, but never got around to it. A mattress was added to the room because Bucky refused to sleep and would most of the time go until the collapsed.

Any time they went to give him food, they couldn't use Steve, Sam, Natasha or Tony due to his previous orders to either kill them or kill someone they looked similar to. Which resulted in Clint or a anxious Bruce having to go inside and set the plate or bowl down on the floor.

Bucky every day would either sit on the bed and stare, zoning out, or beat the wall and door and toss the mattress. There was no in between.

It had been two years, during the conflict with Ultron, they left Maria to bring him food when they couldn't. He had almost killed her, she walked in to set the food down and he grabbed her hair and threw her into the floor, dislocating her shoulder and bruising her cheekbone.

Steve he had almost killed a total of twelve times. Five times he broke his ribs, twice he broke a collarbone, eight cases of just about breaking his head open, and a whopping eleven times he had choked him til his vision faded and he couldn't breathe afterwards for an hour. Yet Steve every time assured everyone that he remembered him on that hellcarrier and no one doubted him, but yet, they began thinking that was it.

After a year and a half, Steve could tell that the rest of Avengers told him with glances and fake smiles, that Bucky wasn't going to make progress. It angered him that behind their 'it's going to be okay' phrases, they were saying it was impossible.

Two years, and it began festering in Steve that Bucky was truly gone, and he couldn't take the truth, he wouldn't. Steve still believed that it was going to take time and that there was still hope, but it had been two whole years.

Finally, one day, it was when everyone, even Steve realized, it was enough. Clint as always took the food into the room, Bucky that day was zoned out, but when the door opened, he sprinted towards Hawkeye and tackled him to the ground.

By the time anyone could get in the room and stop him, he had broken Clint's arm, cut his stomach and chest with wiring from the mattress they somehow didn't catch, and punched his face to where blood was pouring. Clint recovered, but he had to be hospitalized for a good while, no one had been injured that badly til then. Trying to get Bucky off of Clint had ended with Steve also getting shanked in the thigh with the wire, Tony's suit getting the hand busted off, breaking two his fingers, and Natasha with a black eye and cut lip.

The next day Steve woke up and FRIDAY informed him that the Avengers were all waiting for him in the conference room. Steve immediately dreaded the conversation, but he went anyway.

There was a seat open for him and all the Avengers were there except for Clint who was rushed to the emergency room last night. Steve sat down, Natasha and Sam on the right and left of him, Tony across the circular table and Bruce standing in the back.

''Hey Cap,'' Tony said harboring his fingers in his other hand.

''I've told you guys a million times, he recognized me on that hellcarrier, he's still in there,'' Steve defensed knowing where this was going.

Natasha turned to Tony, her face sullen, and sighed as if Steve was oblivious.

''I don't think so anymore,'' Tony said in an apologetic tone.

''Tony, your father told you stories about him growing up, you know what kind of man he is, you've seen the videos from war. Deep down, he's not this monster and you know it,'' Steve firmly stated.

''Yes, and I would've heard more about him from my father, had he not snapped his neck,'' Tony didn't say it with any resentment, he just put it out as a fact.

''Are you saying he's responsible,'' Steve got upset and his voice raised.

''No Steve, I'm saying one day...he'll break your neck.''

The comment hit Steve like a truck, he was okay with dying so Bucky could remember who he was, but he never considered that Bucky would do it and nothing would happen afterwards, little alone someone else telling him.

''We can't give up on him,'' Steve replied transitioning to another excuse.

''It's been two years,'' Sam acknowledged calmly.

''I can't believe you guys are doing this to him.''

''He's going to kill someone,'' Natasha tried to explain.

''He won't...he hasn't killed anyone yet.''

Tony had been frustrated from the stress of the last two years, he let it build, and Steve withdrawing into denial made him burst, he hit the table and stood up ''CLINT IS IN THE HOSPITAL AND COULD GO INTO A COMA, Steve, wake up...it's over, finished, we've done everything we can.''

He didn't mean for it to sound so angry and threatening, Steve jumped and shut his eyes trying to keep away his thoughts of understanding their point. He failed.

''I'm sorry,'' Steve answered quietly, afraid to make eye contact.

''...No, I am, I shouldn't of-''

''Tony, you're right,'' Steve interrupted ''I wanted so desperately to have my friend back that I've thrown away everything that's happened, but understand, I. Cannot. Give up. On him.''

''I know you can't, and I feel that, I don't want to give up on him anymore than you do, but we are entering territory where we need to think of our last ditch option, and go with it.''

''And what would that be?''

''...Putting him down.''

Steve flew up out of the chair making it fall back into the floor and he steamed ''HE'S NOT A RABID DOG!''

''I know he's not Steve, but you thought about if he had actually died when he fell, it would've been much better for him, don't lie.''

''That doesn't mean he should die now, they're not hurting him.''

''They are, every day he's like this they are hurting him,'' Natasha declared ''he doesn't deserve this.''

''So you want to put him out of his misery,'' Steve questioned to confirm, his voice getting scared at the fact that he agreed.

''We wanted to avoid the cliche phrase, but...yes,'' Tony admitted.

Steve puts his hands on the table and looked down and shook his head, he began shaking.

''I'm so sorry,'' Tony offered, you could hear that this option really did hurt him as well.

''Don't be...it's just...not fair,'' Steve's eyes were wet.

''I know.''

Everyone sat in silence for a few minutes, letting in sink in what would have to happen in the next hour. If one had to guess, each person wanted to procrastinate, darkness settling in their souls as their hearts told them it was wrong, but the logical part of them knowing this was best.

After a while, Steve looked up, and took a deep breath ''I'll do it,'' his voice spoke, still strong.

''It should be you,'' Natasha seeming relieved he offered, she pulled out her pistol and laid in on the table ''it needs to be you.''

''I have to do it now,'' Steve's voice finally started cracking.

''If not now...when?''

Steve squeezed his eyes willing the tears to stay as he again knew that what they were saying was true. He just didn't want it to.

''What's he doing right now?''

''FRIDAY, live security feed of the Hulk room,'' Tony requested.

The projection came up to show that Bucky was sitting zoned out again on the mattress, telling Steve it was best to do it now. Natasha grabbed the gun from where she put it down, cocked it, and flipped it holding the handle out to Steve from him to take, her face heavy-hearted. She gave a false smile to reassure Steve, he gave one back.

He took the gun and with despair walked to door and stopped, he looked back at his friends sitting at the table, Sam nodded to tell him it would be okay.

''FRIDAY, open door,'' Steve demanded his voice completely covered in remorse.

The metal door slid open and he marched in.

''FRIDAY, turn off security camera in Hulk proof room,'' Tony said, him and the others watching the live video feed turn into static on the projection.

Steve stepped up to Bucky and bent down in front of him balancing on his feet and looked into his friend's eyes, they shadowed at the sight of the man he had tried to kill so many times, but he didn't move.

''I remember when we were twelve, I had a really bad asthma attack, you sat with me the whole time, you said one day you would save me, and you did. You kept me out of fights and beat up bullies for me, making sure I wouldn't get hurt. Well, when it was my turn to save you, I couldn't, not then on that train, not in these last two years,'' Steve took a break, unable to get any more words out, his voice becoming mumbled and incoherent.

He moved a strand of hair out of Bucky's face ''You were and are my best friend, and this is the only way I can save you...God, I'm so sorry this is the only way I can save you.''

Steve began sobbing, he couldn't hold it back anymore, it just let it out without any ability to keep it back. He leaned over to Bucky and kissed the top of his long hair.

''I found the end of the line, bud,'' Steve whispered his breath barely unable to say it.

He stood up and took a few steps back and stared at Bucky for just a moment more, he would remember him as the guy who followed him into war, the one who spent all his money to impress a girl, the one who he never failed to make laugh. He wasn't the person sitting here now, unresponsive and hostile, cleaned of his humanity and replaced with some robot, that's what HYDRA did to people.

'сделай это','' he said monotone, Steve knew only bits of Russian, Natasha had taught him a small amount, hearing him say 'do it' made it worse. He had recognized him on the hellcarrier and had pulled him from the river, there was no mistaking it, but that was as far as his recovery could go, and it physically hurt Steve that he knew that. He was in there, somewhere way below the surface, but it was proven he would never return. Steve had hoped that one day he would, but then it turned into lying to himself. True is wasn't fair, but it also wasn't fair to let Bucky live when he couldn't really live.

Steve raised the gun, angry with himself and everyone, that 'why didn't the world work the way he wanted it to'.

Outside the other Avengers still sat awaiting what they were hoping wouldn't have to happen. Sam and Tony wiped the tears that fell onto their cheeks, Natasha sighed mournfully, and Bruce plugged his ears at the last second.

The shot rang out.


End file.
